Goodbye - not so good after all.

Sitting on a hard-bound copy of his BTP thesis, drinking the cheap “Old Smuggler”, Deewaker took a deep kash and said “Goodbye”. Goodbye to 4 years of refugee life. Goodbye to frustapa for a girlfriend (like he stood a chance in the outside world), goodbye to messy mess food and goodbye to sleep-hating lectures, goodbye to 4 years of pain.

Then he said something that smuggled the Old Smuggler out of our system. To quote him: “As some of the best brains of India, we have spend the best time of our lives in the worst possible place.” Somehow none of us could muster the strength to fight back against his bold statement. He went on to explain how his friends in other colleges have got good financial jobs, how they all have 2 girlfriends (keeping just one meant there was something wrong with you. No girlfriends simply meant you were gay) and how they laughed at his decision, each time he goes home.  He asked for a round of cold pizza (no chance of getting a hot one while sitting 20kms from civilzation) and continued to explain ‘life’ to us.

It felt as if Deewaker was saying something we had felt all along. May it was the booze talking or maybe it was just a downpour of emotions but all of it seemed true. Had we really donated our life in exchange of an IIT degree? Just as we were digesting the reality, along came another emotional avalanche, this time it was Prabhu. He gulped down his shot and said f*@# you Deewaker, I have enjoyed every second of my life here. Yes the classes sucked, the no gf thing was cruel, no doubt the food yucked but my life with you guys simply rocked. “What about the Rubel walks, the class bunks, the SOFing, the canteen bakars, the DPs , the Alchers, the Manthans, the night-outs, the shillong trips and what about all the time spent together.“ ranted Prabhu. Then it all came back, the good times, the bad times, and the ugly ones too. Being there for each other, trying to hide your frustration to help somebody else, lending an ear whenever someone was down.

A sudden flash and electricity was back. From where I could see, Deewaker had wet cheeks and red eyes. He stood up, crushed the cigarette bud and said “Prabhu you @#@#*$ you have ruined my life. I wanted this to end tonight so that the pain maybe less. But as always you have to ruin everything. Now get up and give me a hug.” We all huddled together and held on to each other. Another loud noise and Deewaker said “Goodbye my foot. My heart, my soul, my love will still be with IITg”